


Ascended Beings Don't Count

by lalejandra



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Character Study, Gen, Transformative Works Welcome
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-04-20
Updated: 2006-04-20
Packaged: 2019-07-14 10:10:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16038305
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lalejandra/pseuds/lalejandra
Summary: Rodney is the smartest person in two galaxies.





	Ascended Beings Don't Count

Rodney's favorite thing about Atlantis is also his least favorite thing: no one knows more about Atlantis and the people on Atlantis than him. He is the smartest person there, and he gets to know all the gossip. He, in fact, has search strings hidden in the daily processes that deliver to him all the email and chat transcripts that mention him, Sheppard (aka "John", aka "Hottie McHotterson", aka "Flyboy McHotness"), Ronon (who does not seem to have some kind of bizarre Irish nickname), ZPMs (aka "the zero points", aka "the Z-module", aka "the batteries"), and chocolate. There is a separate search string only for names for chocolate, which sometimes gets Rodney porn that he didn't _want_ to know about -- holy fuck, botanists were weird and creepy _everywhere_ , not just Siberia and the Antarctic -- but usually gets Rodney knowledge of hidden caches of Cadbury Flake.

He usually ignores it all, because there are only so many emails about what a bad boss he is that he can read in one day. It's not like he was hired for his personality or management skills. He gets it. Rodney was hired on to the SGC and sent to Atlantis for one reason and one reason only: He could keep them alive. he could do that because he's the smartest person in two galaxies -- who's still alive, anyway. Ancients and Ascended beings don't count. Ever. That's cheating.

  



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